30 weeks is bittersweet

  30 weeks pregnant seems like a big milestone somehow.  It is actually a little bittersweet, knowing this will likely be the last time I am ever pregnant.  People say things like, "I'll bet you can't wait until that baby gets here!", and thats so far from the truth!  Of course I look forward to Avery's arrival, but I don't want time to speed up, no matter how uncomfortable I get.  I want to enjoy each and every day of this pregnancy.  I am going to treasure her delivery when it happens.  It already makes me sad thinking about it all being over.  Sad to think about having a brand new baby only one last time.  All this sad and nostalgia may have you thinking, that woman isn't done having kids!  Maybe you are right, and I don't know what God holds in store for us.  However, I just don't know how we will financially swing a fourth child, so I am preparing myself for life with three kiddos only, and treasuring the last weeks in a chapter in my life that feels like it is almost over.

  I started writing this post this past Tuesday, when I actually hit the 30 week mark.  Now its New Years Eve.  Tomorrow it will be 2012, and it will be the year we welcome our baby girl Avery and my big girls will turn 3 and then 6.  I know you are supposed to make New Year's resolutions, but really I just want to make a New Year's wish.  I wish for time to slow down!  I guess I can turn that into a resolution by saying, I pledge to enjoy every fleeting moment, both the good and the bad, because I can already see it going by in the blink of an eye!!